


There's something I wanna tell her

by sherlylikeswaffles



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, FitzSimmons - Freeform, Fluff, after season two, fitz/skye friendship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-08-15
Packaged: 2018-04-04 21:52:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4154319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sherlylikeswaffles/pseuds/sherlylikeswaffles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Set after the season two finale...Fitz desperately wants to get Simmons back but so far he hasn't figured out how. So he comes to the room where she vanished and finally tells her how he feels about her because she can't hear him, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I just watched the season two finale. Everything could have been so nice. Fitzsimmons is canon and all but then those last seconds really got me! So here are some feels...I don't know how long this fic will be and if there is a happy ending but so far it's mostly fluff.

Fitz didn't know how he got there but now he stood in front of the door of the room in which Jemma had disappeared. It has been three days since he had last been in there. He opened the door cautiously and then stepped inside. The room looked still like it had on the videos he had been watching just about half an hour ago. Fitz starred at the black artefact in the middle of the glass box. He couldn't believe it. Jemma was in there...somewhere. At least that was what he told himself. That was what he hoped. But really how could she still be alive? He had watched how she got swallowed over and over again. It had been the worst he had ever experienced but he couldn't stop himself from watching, looking for any clue about how he could save her.  
But three days have passed and he hadn't come any step closer to her.  
“Jemma?” he called out. Obviously it was completely stupid. She couldn't hear him, where ever she was. The black thing remained unmoving. All of the sudden he thought of Ward's words back when they hadn't know he was an evil bastard...” If there's something you wanna tell her, don't wait”.... Why was he thinking of Ward of all people? He hated him. But there lay some truth in his words. He really should have talked to Jemma sooner.  
“Jemma, it's all my fault,” he cried. None of the others had blamed him. They all have tried to cheer him up and told him that Jemma was fine. But he knew she wasn't. “If it hadn't been for me, you would be sitting here next to me, Jemma. And why is that? I was so nervous about asking you out that I opened the damn door. I screwed everything up. I'm sorry, Jemma. I can't tell you how sorry I am.” He choked up. Finally he could talk about what had been on his mind these past three days. He sat down against the wall. Exhausted by the pressure of the last days that seemed like months.  
“I always said there was nothing to discuss but the thing is there was lots to talk about. I shouldn't have shut you out. What I said at the bottom of the ocean, well, Jemma, I didn't expect to survive. But I realised that I shouldn't have said it then and there. It wasn't the right time. It wasn't the right place. If I could turn back in time, I would have told you earlier. I would have told you that I love you,” Fitz tried to blow his nose but he was crying too hard now.  
“Jemma, I love you, “ he whispered, “I don't know how it happened. We were best friend and suddenly I realised that you were so much more than that. You know, when you asked me what Trip had done to upset me? It hadn't been him, not exactly. The truth is, I had been jealous of him. You two seemed to be flirting with each other. I guess, you have just been nice, because you always are. But when I noticed that I was jealous, I knew that I was in love with you but how I got there I honestly don't know. Maybe it was your smile. You seem to have this special smile that is only reserved for me. Maybe it's the way you get a little too excited about things. Like when you laugh and smile and talk way too fast. It's so cute. Maybe it was because you just completely get me. Around the others I'm always so self-concious, nervous that I might say the wrong thing. But with you, I feel like I don't have to worry at all. Being with you, I'm being myself and that's when I'm the happiest. So maybe it's because you make me happy, that I fell for you. But actually there are so many reasons to love you that I don't remember when it started. “ He waited a bit. Wondering what else he wanted to tell her but never had.  
“I never told you that I think that you're technically smarter than me,” he began, “Your intelligence is one of the reasons why you can keep up with me so easily. But I never really admitted that you're smarter. You always have been and you are 22 days younger than me. I don't know anyone who is smarter than you, really I don't and I admire that so much about you. And I never admitted that I'm glad you persuaded me to go on the Bus. I gave you are hard time for talking me into it and I feel like you thought it was your fault that my brain got damaged in the first place. But really, I'm so glad that we did this. We met amazing people and I would have never wanted to be separated from you.”  
Starring at the black thing he knew that was exactly what happened. They were separated and he felt like he had lost part of himself. He had felt bad when Jemma had left to work undercover inside Hydra. But this was worse. Far worse.  
“Jemma, I swear. I'll either get you out of there or I'll join you.” With these words Fitz stood up, sweeping the last tear of his cheek. Then he left the room, prepared to do everything he could to save the love of his life. 

Fitz hadn't thought Jemma would be able to listen. But actually she had heard every word. Jemma Simmons didn't know where she was. All she knew that she was surrounded by darkness and for what had seemed forever she had heard no sound and had had no clue where she was and what was going on. And then this...Fitz' voice had reached her clearly. She had tried to shout back but all over her words have been shallowed by the darkness around her. But just hearing him say all these beautiful things about her has made her believe she could hold on. Fitz loved her and she wanted nothing more but to tell him that she loved him, too and then kiss him. On the mouth this time. Not just some small kisses on the cheek or the forehead. She had smiled to herself when Fitz admitted that she was smarter. Although she didn't quite believe it. He just wanted to flatter her. But then the reality of the situation hit her. Fitz thought she was gone, probably forever. He couldn't know she listened. And in this moment Jemma understood that every single word Fitz had said was true and it made her love him even more. So when he finished, she cried out again, although her shout was lost: “No Fitz, don't join me! I don't want you to die with me!”  
It was true that the thought of Fitz and her dying together at the bottom of the ocean had been somewhat comforting. But given the choice, Jemma would rather die right now, than be responsible for Fitz' death. But it was too late, Fitz had already left the room.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skye finds Fitz in the room where Jemma vanished. They talk about what happened. Fitz/Skye friendship.

Another day passed. Another day without Jemma. Without really meaning to, Fitz ended up once again sitting against the wall in the room with the Kree stone.   
“Jemma, I'm sorry. I failed you...I wanted to save you by now. But I don't know how...” He tried to steady his voice. “Jemma, do you remember the day when you jumped out of the Bus? Well, of course, you would remember. You said the same words back then. That you didn't know how to fix it. And I told you that we would work it out together. And we did it, in the end. But now, I'm sorry, Jemma but I can't fix this without you. I noticed how people started to see us as Simmons and Fitz rather than just Fitzsimmons and that's fine. But the truth is that we never work better than as Fitzsimmons. With you, Jemma, I can fix this, I'm sure. But you are not here and I don't know how...” Fitz started sobbing then. He had told himself to stay strong and not cry but then again why should it matter? He was alone and with Jemma gone he had every reason to be sad. Still he usually was the one who hold things together even though he felt like falling apart. He wondered if Jemma had ever even noticed. But he had done it for her. Whenever she had cried, he had felt like crying, too, but he never had cried. He hugged her, told her everything would be okay...but he never cried in front of her. Maybe it was because of some stupid reason like he didn't want her to see him weak. But maybe it was because he wanted to comfort her and not make her worry about him. So when he cried, it was the ultimate sign that things couldn't get worse. Crying was the only right reaction to losing Jemma.   
There was a soft knock at the door. Fitz quickly pulled the sleeve of his sweater over his eyes and looked up. Skye entered the room.   
“Fitz, what are you doing here?” She asked, moving towards him.   
“Uh...err...,” Fitz stammered,”I know this might sound a bit weird...but I feel like...you know maybe Jemma can hear me...or at least I can just sit here and think about her.”  
“Oh, Fitz!” Skye sat down beside him, “I think I understand...you know I used to talk to my parents... before I knew they were both serial killers, of course. But I sort of imagined that they could listen to me where ever they are.”  
Fitz nodded. He didn't know what to say.   
“You know, Fitz, Jemma will come back,” Skye said sincerely.   
“How can you be sure?” Fitz asked.   
“Because you're going to bring her back.”  
“But...I don't know how,” Fitz said again.   
“Maybe not right now, but you will figure something out. You are part of Fitzsimmons, you always figure everything out. And this, this is pretty bad, but it's just another mission, another riddle to solve.”  
Fitz looked at her disbelievingly. “Skye, I'm sorry but I can't figure this out...at least not without Jemma.”  
“No, Fitz! I know this sucks. It sucks that Jemma is gone. But you can't give up on her!” Skye shouted and Fitz didn't know why. Why should she be so pissed off? But then he realised that he couldn't be the only one who missed Jemma.   
“I'm not giving up on her. I would never do that. It's just...I'm running out of options. We apparently can't crack this thing open and pull her out and if we touch it we get eaten, too. So what am I supposed to do?”   
Skye didn't reply to that. Apparently she had run out of encouraging things to say or maybe she was just lost in thoughts.   
“We wanted to go on a date,” Fitz broke the silence. It was merely a whisper.  
“She didn't tell me that. That's wonderful!”  
“Well, I just asked her right before...before she...”  
“Oh, that's too bad. So you two had finally done the “talking about your feelings” thing?”  
“Yeah, well not exactly. There was so much we should have talked about...”  
“But how did it happen then? Last thing I knew was that you told her you loved her and she didn't quite feel the same way.” Skye asked.  
“Before I left for our last mission, Jemma came to me in the locker room. She said that she had just seen Hunter and Bobbi and it made her realise that...well that she had romantic feelings for me after all or I don't know exactly what. But she mentioned what I said to her at the bottom of the ocean and that she wanted to talk about it. I thought that maybe she wanted to apologise again or say that she still doesn't love me back. So I told her that there was nothing to discuss. And really, I believed that there was nothing. For the past months I have tried hard to get over her. You know, to stop loving her but eventually I realised I couldn't. So I just wanted to be her best friend again because this was so much better than not talking and keeping her out of my life...” Rethinking it now, it seemed ridiculous to him that he ever believed he could stop loving her. Over the past ten years he had gradually fallen for her without realising it and something like that couldn't end overnight.   
He continued and Skye listened eagerly: “I said there was nothing to discuss and she held me back and said “Maybe there is”. Just these three little words. But they meant everything. And before I could say anything, Coulson called and I had to leave.”  
“Oh, Fitz, I'm so sorry,” Skye said and put her arm around him.   
“I think the worst thing is that I didn't say anything back then. I mean I could have told Coulson to wait a second or looked back to Jemma or when I asked her to go out for dinner with me, I should have told her. But I didn't. I thought we had time.”  
“I know,” Skye whispered, “But, Fitz, it doesn't matter. Jemma knows that you love her. And anyway...” Skye suddenly turned towards the door, which was opened. Lincoln looked inside. “Skye! Fitz!” He called out, “I discovered something. Something about the Kree stone. Come and look!”  
“What? That's great!” Skye replied, jumping up. She took Fitz' hand and pulled him to his feet. “Come on, Fitz!”, she urged him when he didn't follow her right away. Before Fitz left the room, he turned back once again and whispered: “I haven't given up on you, Jemma.”

A tiny bit of hope rose up inside Jemma. Lincoln had discovered something. They were making progress. And Fitz, Fitz hasn't given up, not on her but most importantly not on himself. She would survive this and finally say these three little words to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It would be awesome if you could comment. This is the longest Fitzsimmons fic I wrote so far and I'm still not sure how it'll end. I could use some suggestions. Happy or not so happy ending?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took me so long. For the last chapter I asked whether it should be a good or a happy ending, so I kind of did both, I think. Because there's some angst involved but also fluff, yeah mostly fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments. I really appreciate them very much and sorry again that it took me so long to update. I love Fitzsimmons so much! I don't know anything about the Kree stone or if this is actually possible the way I described it, but then again it's fanfiction, so I guess everything is possible?

Skye and Fitz followed Lincoln into the lab. On the holotable was a 3D projection of the Kree stone and various articles and dictionary entries hovered beside it. Fit couldn't see what was different from the last time he had been here, which had in fact just been a little over an hour.   
“I found an ancient story about an alien artefact,” explained Lincoln, pointing the picture in the right top corner, “It doesn't say that it is about the Kree stone, but I believe it is because we have never heard of anything else that can swallow people. Anyway, the story says that the stone needs in order to exist a living being inside. Interestingly, it only needs one and doesn't have the capacity to swallow more.”  
“What does that mean?” asked Fitz.   
“It means that when the stone gets someone or something else, Simmons will be released.”  
“Jemma can be saved?” Fitz said disbelievingly.   
“Yes, theoretically. But I don't know yet how and what we can put inside the stone in exchange for her. And we have to do it fast because the stone is using her energy.”   
There was a moment of silence. Everybody contemplated what Lincoln had just said. Then Fitz said: “I'll do it.”  
“Do what?”  
“I will get absorbed by the stone instead of Jemma. I'll replace her.”  
“No, Fitz, you can't,” exclaimed Skye.   
“Skye, I can and I must. It's our only chance that Jemma survives this.”  
“But this is not what Jemma would want. She would want you to come up with a smart alternative.”  
“An alternative to what? Death? Skye, there is no other way!”  
Before Skye could stop him, Fitz left the room and ran to Jemma. He wanted to throw the door open and get eaten by the stone right away. But then he reconsidered. Jemma would have hated him for his reckless behaviour.   
“Fitz,” she would say, if she were here, “you should think this through. Calm down.” He could practically feel her hand resting on his shoulder, calming him down more than her words did. He was imagining her again, he realised. He missed her so damn much. A world without Jemma should not exist, could not exist. He took a step forward again. He could reach for the door. He could do it now.   
“Fitz, no!” Skye had caught up with him and behind her was Lincoln. She reached for him, but his hand was already at the door. Skye stopped her movement. “Please, Fitz, this is not a solution. We'll rescue her. But not like this.”  
“Skye, I'm sorry, really am, but it's... Jemma,” with these words Fitz opened the door. There was a weird sound as the Kree stone changed its structure. Skye's horrified expressions as she tried to hold him back was the last thing he saw before he was shallowed by darkness.   
“Jemma,” he tried to call, but no sound left his mouth. He wanted to move, to touch his surroundings, but it felt like something had his left arm in a tight grip. The stone around him was cold but the touch on his arm felt warm.   
“Jemma?” he tried again. His right arm brushed something, something soft. It felt like hair. His hand travelled down and caught hold of a hand. Jemma's hand, he knew it immediately. He would recognise it everywhere and it was ice cold. Maybe everything was too late. He desperately tried to move towards her and get rid of whatever held him but he couldn't. All he could do was feel Jemma's cold hand in his.  
Fitz really should have thought this through first. He didn't know what to do now. He had gotten emotions in his way instead of listening to scientific facts. How was he supposed to push Jemma out of their dark prison? What had grabbed him? Was it part of the stone? Why couldn't he talk? Was there even oxygen here or would he slowly drown like he was supposed to in the sea?  
At least he could still think. He squeezed Jemma's hand as if to make sure she was actually still there. And suddenly it felt like she was squeezing back, just lightly but she moved. She was alive. Relief like he never had felt before washed over him. Jemma was alive.   
Before he could really react, he was pulled by the force that had grabbed him around his arm and suddenly he couldn't see anything, not even darkness. Was this what dying felt like, he wondered. It wasn't that bad after all, just too bright. Jemma is alive, was his last real thought and then he blacked out.  
When Leo Fitz woke up, he felt that he lay on something soft, like a bed and that it smelled strangely familiar like detergents and hospital. Slowly he opened his eyes. He was not dead. Why was he not dead?  
He was in some sort of hospital room and he was not alone. On his left he could see another bed and someone slept there, someone with brown shoulder- long hair and cute nose. Jemma! Fitz sat up too fast and his head started to spin but he managed to get a look. It really was Jemma. Tubes were running in and out of her, but she breathed steadily. She looked pale but still, oh, so beautiful.   
“Fitz, you woke up!” He turned around. Skye stood in the doorway and behind her was Coulson.   
“Skye? How...?” Fitz asked, whispering because he didn't want to wake up Jemma.   
Skye smiled. She looked exhausted but otherwise she seemed happier than she had in a long time.   
“I pulled you out. That was really stupid of you,” Skye said.   
“You pulled me out? But how...?” Fitz starred at her disbelievingly.   
“Actually I pulled you both out,” she nodded towards Jemma, “Well, about the how...I don't know how exactly. I guess I just didn't want to loose you so when you reached for the door I reached for you and it was a tough fight with the stone but eventually I pulled you out. Lincoln helped me. And things like this, well sometimes it's quite useful to be Inhuman”  
“Wow...thank you, Skye,” Fitz was about to cry, “You saved me, you saved Jemma.”   
“You're welcome,” Skye hugged him, “Any time, Fitz. But please don't do anything as stupid as that again, okay?”  
“I'll try,” he said eventually.   
“Really Fitz, we can't afford to loose you. Any of you,” Coulson said. He actually looked stern as he said this but Fitz also saw a hint of a smile because he was just happy his two favourite scientists were alright.   
“How is Jemma?” Fitz asked, looking over to her.   
“She is stabilised. But being in the Kree stone for so long took a lot of energy so we don't know how long she'll need to recover...In fact she probably is the only person on the team that would know...” Coulson explained.   
Fitz nodded. Jemma usually acted as the doctor of the team but now she couldn't treat her own wounds. But she was okay...for now.   
“Do you think, it might have a lasting impact on her? Do you think she changed somehow?” Suddenly Fitz wasn't as happy as he had been moments before. They had dealt with too much supernatural stuff lately. Something like being shallowed by an alien artefact had to leave its marks.   
Coulson and Skye watched Jemma thoughtfully, then Coulson said: “We don't know. Again this is something she could easily figure out, doing a blood analysis or something. I think we need another biochemist to help us.”  
Fitz nodded again. He tried not to worry too much what that could mean. Maybe Jemma would never be the same. When Skye and Coulson left, he couldn't help but cry a little. When he had asked Jemma out for a date, it had felt like finally things were going in the right direction. But now? Everything was possible...

“Fitz,” she said, her voice was barely a whisper. Jemma opened her eyes. He was there, right beside her. Fitz sat in a chair next to her bed and smiled down to her.   
“Jemma, how are you?”  
She looked down on herself and slowly tried to sit up but Fitz gently pushed her back into the pill. “Take it easy,” he said.   
“I must look like hell,” she whispered.   
“Oh, Jemma” Fitz laughed, “You could be dead, but that's what you're worried about?”  
“Don't “Oh, Jemma” me! Do I not look like hell?” she asked, smiling at him.   
“Yeah...okay you kind of do...but you're still beautiful.”  
Jemma's smile lit up her whole face. Fitz was so cute. Why had she never noticed that much sooner? She was so lucky to have him.   
“I suppose this isn't somewhere nice?” she wanted to know.  
“Err...what?”  
“You said you wanted to go out with me somewhere nice?”  
“Yeah...sure...I said that but...?”  
“But what?” What was he getting at?  
“We can't really go anywhere when you're like this.”  
“I know, “Jemma said sadly, “but I really want to.”  
Fitz smiled his adorable smile and took her hand into his. Her hand was still cool, but his fingers were warm. The warmth from their joined hands spread through Jemma's whole body.   
“Well, I promise as soon as possible we go somewhere nice but for now...I think just because you're here it's nice... actually it's more than nice...” He was rambling, like always when he got nervous.   
“Come here,” Jemma said.  
Fitz leaned towards her.   
“Closer,” she ordered. He did. When his face was right over hers, she pulled his mouth to hers and kissed him. It was a sweet first kiss. Fitz was gentle but she also felt how excited he was to kiss her. One of his hand pushed through her hair and the other trailed down the side of her face.   
When they broke apart, Fitz grinned and said: “There's something I wanna tell you.”  
“Yes?”  
“I love you,“ and this time he did not ramble or cry.   
“When I was...there...I could hear you...hearing your voice...the things you said...it kept me alive,” Jemma said, now it was her turn to ramble. A tear escaped her eyes. “I love you, too.” Four little words.


End file.
